A New Realization...
I figured it out today: The movie's never gonna be finished. And I think I know why: About a month ago the guy at the gas station gave me $10 too much in change. I knew it. I kept it. And unbeknownst to me this act damned me. Then I drove off and -- while I don't remember this specifically -- what must've happened was that I got hit by a bus and killed instantly.
Now I'm in Hell. Because in Hell you spend eternity listening to really bad music within your low budget film's price range. It comes in the mail. It comes via computer. And it never stops coming. Because in Hell when you think you've found a song that will put an end to it -- a song within your low budget film's price range -- a producer vetoes it and you start over... And he's right.
Another reason I know I'm in Hell is because Hitler skied by my window Sunday when the Academy Awards' announcer reminded us Ben Affleck had an Oscar.
Now I'm in Hell. Because in Hell you spend eternity listening to really bad music within your low budget film's price range. It comes in the mail. It comes via computer. And it never stops coming. Because in Hell when you think you've found a song that will put an end to it -- a song within your low budget film's price range -- a producer vetoes it and you start over... And he's right.
Another reason I know I'm in Hell is because Hitler skied by my window Sunday when the Academy Awards' announcer reminded us Ben Affleck had an Oscar.
posted by Contributors at 3:25 PM
2 Comments:
Well, get back there and pay the guy, already! I wanna see the movie!!
Oh, and speaking of Ben Affleck's Oscar: If you ever REALLY want to depress yourself (you know, just in the case the music isn't enough), you can play the "Cary Grant Didn't Get an Oscar But . . . " game.
Example: "Cary Grant didn't get an Oscar but Ben Affleck did."
Or: "Cary Grant didn't get an Oscar but Eminem did."
Repeat ad nauseam. But not too often, or they'll have to haul you in off the ledge.
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